17 October, 2007, 1233 am
Filed under: Barrels of Fun, Music, My Experience with Existence, Nouvelle Musique, School

So relationship status. I’m single again, big surprise. You saw it coming. It was stupid. I’m stupid. I trust people easily. And as for bragging only about making out with me–please! I’ll let anyone kiss me if I like them enough (nobody really has the balls to try, hah); what’s really hard to get to is my inner workings. What’s better to brag about is my mind, since it’s hard to decipher, or conversation, since it’s fairly hard to come by.

Speaking of ah, the mind and all that, today in English class, we discussed the traits of Cordelia as the ideal Elizabethan woman. Here are the five things we wrote down:

1) Shows grief at father’s treatment
2) Regal
3) Honest
4) Supports France without question/Takes action as a wife
5) Quiet, even when upset

The main point is that Cordelia is not aggressive. Except for being regal, haha, I find that I share many of Cordelia’s traits. There’s no use in being modest about my honesty–I don’t find much point in lying. Okay, so then we wrote out the traits of Regan and Goneril.

1) Set dad up to go nuts
2) Governed by passions (sluts and whores)
3) Liars
4) Leaders/Making decisions
5) Violent/Angry/Always yelling and screaming

In essence, they are aggressive. But then we had to dissect the traits of Regan and Goneril further and come up with all their redeeming qualities, based both on the above list and on general knowledge.

-Reward loyalty
-Make decisions
-Get angry (which you sometimes need to back you up)

Then we went into a discussion about these three lists. In Shakespearean times, Cordelia was the ideal woman. But if you look at the redeeming traits of Regan and Goneril, even if they’re evil, those are the traits that are encouraged in society today. Essentially, Cordelia’s role as the more reserved, obedient daughter or wife is kind of looked down upon. And for the whole five to seven minutes we were discussing these lists, I was tense in my seat, and I felt some blood rise to my head, and my heart started to pump faster. Because for those five to seven minutes, like it or not, my outward personality was being critiqued, picked apart broken down, and it just contributes to everything, honestly. Finding out that the shy kids are seen as outcasts not only in their own eyes, but in their peers’ eyes is just…ahh, it makes me angry. Where’s this acceptance? Or is it just supposed to be accept and move on? Accept and turn a blind eye? I mean, I know I don’t do shit to go out of my way and reach out to people unless they’re all alone–just because I know what it’s like! But I am not properly equipped to try and make friends with people who already have their guard up. My sole purpose, I suppose, is to give brand new insight if someone comes to me with a question or a situation. And it’s not always good insight, but I try.

We also talked about astrological signs. I’m a Virgo, and I’m the most stereotypical Virgo EVER to walk the face of the earth. I’m detail-oriented, I like to help out, I keep my own feelings to myself, I’m anxious, and I’m healthy. Healthy enough. Ah, not on my deathbed. There. Healthy. Someone in my class brought up the point of nature versus nurture–if we are encouraged to grow into our astrological signs, then it’s more likely that we’ll develop those traits, right? I mean, maybe. But I’ve always had these tendencies, since before I learned about astrology. And my sisters are different from me, too, and they were raised relatively the same, maybe with a little less discipline for bad behavior. And look, they’re Capricorns, and they’re constantly arguing with one another. Plus, my mother claims that she was like me at my age–very reserved–and she’s a Virgo, too (of course, I attribute it to genetics). I don’t believe her, of course; she was able to do things like the school play, which is an activity I could never dream of doing. But my aunt says that of my mother, too, that she was shy. My mom, by the by, always used to become extremely angry when elementary school teachers wrote that I was shy or quiet on my report card. She said that’s no way to describe a person. And my father’s not all too outgoing himself. I think it’s the way we were raised. I think we could grow into our astrological signs, but there’s no guarantee. It’s just a stereotype. My question to you–do you or do you not fit your astrological sign’s stereotype?

Ahh, off topic…I am in love with the way “The Henney Buggy Band” by Sufjan Stevens makes me feel! It’s like a nice spring afternoon where you can eat PB&J sandwiches at the Smurfs picnic table in the back yard of your childhood home. Detailed, very ornate, but so very simple when it all comes down to it. Which is AWESOME. Disregard the video and just listen to the song. I mean, the video’s unofficial, anyway.

I also appreciate “For the Actor” by Mates of State (yeah, fuck yessss) annnnd “Don’t Cry Out” by Shiny Toy Guns (overdone, probably, I know) and I do not care that no one nominated me for Superlatives today because I would not have been nominated for any at Deep Run anyway! I have my music and my drawing utensils. I think I’m good.


7 Comments so far
Leave a comment

jesus that was quick!

plenty more fish in the sea etc :(

sorry i don’t have anything interesting to say.

Comment by adam

i definitely fit cancer’s zodiac characteristics.

Comment by divya

my brother’s a cancer too but he’s really not much like me from what i can tell. i think certain people are more like their signs and certain others aren’t.

Comment by divya

better explanation from wikipedia:

The individuals born under sign is thought to be intuitive, imaginative, emotional, extremely brave, honest, great-sense of humor, funny, cheery, sexual, loyal, supportive, nurturing, compassionate, caring, protective, social, extroverted, romantic, silly, forgiving, giving, dedication, flexible, tenderness, pampering, adoration, and a sensitive character. A Cancer is prone to possessiveness, jealousy, changeability, volatility, control issues, inflexible, glutton, pessimitic, violent temper which can be lost quick, hednoism, quick-tempered, anti-social, and over protective. The Cancer is also known to explode at any moment when provoked. Cancers are generally scared of no one, because of this, they kind of tend to intimidate others.
————-this basically describes me flat out.

Comment by divya

Adam, I know. Haha. That is my shortest relationship, I think, ever. Maybe tied with another one. Only a month.

Divya, I have always thought you were a good Cancer. Cancers and Virgos are supposed to make close mates, too, since Cancers are compassionate and nurturing and good listeners, and Virgos are straightforward observers, I guess. Cancer gives Virgo the attention it wants but cannot ask for, and Virgo’s loyal right back atcha. And the so-called clinginess in Cancers is more than tolerable, since it’s out of love and not out of “I have nothing better to do.”

Comment by leindiemeister

lmao well said! <3

Comment by divya

<3 For the actor

Comment by wut?!

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