5 June, 2007, 502 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

I love running by myself, I love French, I love reading good books, I love being isolated by music, I love feeling excellent, and I hate it when people take me too seriously.

I’m not exactly sure what I’ll do over the summer without French.  I’ll likely have to use it online and on here a bunch.  So brace yourselves.

As of today, Ian Lantzy is one of my heroes.  We had to do peer editing of college essays in English class, and he had to edit Diana’s.  Diana has never been rude or mean to me personally, but she never treats other people well.  It’s basically all about her.  Ian, on the other hand, is a reserved but not shy boy who’s extremely intelligent and witty–or at least, I’d gathered that he was witty because sometimes you can just tell.  Mrs. Fuller always kind of pushes him down because he chooses not to talk (even less than me), but I know he’s bright.  Well, when we peer edited today, we had to write down the best and worst parts of each other person’s paper.  For the worst aspect of Diana’s essay, he wrote something along the lines of, “Take your pick.”  For the best part of her essay, he scrawled,  “When it ended.”  HERO!  And then about five minutes after the gossip had circulated, I overheard him telling his tablemate, “If I’d done my paper the way she did hers, I’d have had it done in five minutes flat.”  Seriously.

Here’s one reason I hate high school…it matters in the short term, but it doesn’t really matter in the long run.  Here’s another reason I hate high school…no one thinks for themselves because they’re so busy trying to fit in because they’re so convinced that it’ll matter in ten years, or even in five years (which it won’t).  Here’s yet another reason I hate high school…the teachers haven’t even gotten it through their thick skulls that popularity and congeniality now won’t matter later.

They say these are the best four years of our lives because in about ten, fifteen years, most girls won’t be able to fit into their size zero jeans–in fact, they won’t even be able to fit into my size threes or fours.  They’ll be like sevens and eights, and I’ll be all, “Whoa there pardner.”  See, for me, the best [number] years of my lives are going to be either in college or after college, when I can do whatever the fuck I want, when I can have friends who have the same interests as, when I can be vegan.

I read a yearbook quote saying something about dying in the middle of your story.  I don’t want that to happen.  I know it sounds morbid, but when I die, I want everyone to remember me for exactly who I am now.  I don’t really want people to mourn, and I know that some will, but I just want everyone to get really drunk and eat some Sour Patch Kids and jump on a moonbounce and listen to some indie music.  They should be so drunk that they’ll dance or mosh.  And I want everyone to come to my little funeral party and have a great time and go home and remember that I want them to be happy.  And they can mourn if they really want to, and I’ll do my best to help them, but I really don’t want anyone to be upset.  I want everyone to live on.

Same thing with when I leave Richmond, except that everyone will be sober and there will be no moonbounce.  I don’t want anyone here to be upset.  Some of my purest feelings on moving are that it’s a world of excitement, and I want to leave.  I want to get out of Richmond and never have to come back, and there are few exceptions to that ‘never have to come back’ part.  It’s a painful admission, but only because not a single soul here sees eye to eye with this.

By the by, I like chocolate fudge.


2 Comments so far
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have funeral playing at your funeral. irony at it’s best!

one thing i hate about senior (or as you call it “high school”) is that you never know if you’re popular or not because everyone talks shit about your back anyway.

chocolate fudge is sexy as shit.

Comment by adam

“and I hate it when people take me too seriously.”— sorry! i just can’t help but worry over the people i care about.

well if you’re that excited about moving, i hope it’s everything you want to be and more. as long as we keep in touch i guess it’ll be okay…

Comment by divya

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